For your eyes only

After a completely horrible comment was made on one of my youtube videos last night, I've decided to take my blog private.

Yes, I have thought about doing this before now. I've been avoiding this step as long as possible, thinking that my writing and pictures and videos were just being enjoyed by friends and family and as importantly, that I wanted my readers to be able to share my blog with others that knew them (or us). I incorrectly assumed that I was flying under the radar anyway.

So when a sexual reference comment about my son landed with a thud in my inbox last night, I was shocked to say the least. Eric happened to be working late yesterday, and after my boys were tucked into bed, it was dark and quiet and lonely in the house. The words hit me like a blinding flash, a searing burn that couldn't be soothed by the cool and dark comfort of truth I repeated to myself - I am safe, my boys are safe. I was extremely shaken by the feelings of vulnerability and fear that immediately flooded into my world, even though I knew this person could not have found me or my sons. His only weapon was crudely chosen words, representing thoughts that were too dark to repeat. I was terrified for my sons, for their future, for the world that we live in that is home to even one mind such as his.

For that reason, my blog is now private. And my youtube videos are quickly going private as well.

If you're reading this, it's because you're very welcome here - I'm glad you're here. My blog is my most consistent (ha! that's just laughable over the course of this last year!) method of expressing my creativity and it's a treasured way for me to share the goings-on of my family with you all.

If you have friends or family members that you want to share my blog with, just drop me a note, I'm happy to add them - really it's not a bother at all. A great sorrow about taking this blog private is that there is now a hoop to jump through before you can access my stories and pictures. I hope you'll understand it's necessity and visit often.

And please leave a comment. Your comments, especially now, will give me a reason to come back and begin to pour myself back into this little family journal. I want to be excited about my writing again. Until then, I hope you enjoy a *private* glimpse into the last three years of my life...